Fulmer Loses Sumo Match to the Fatman;Knoxville Prep Football Star Harrison “Scrooge” Smith Spurns the Vols
In keeping with a new Tennessee High School football recruiting tradition, Harrison Smith announced his intentions to sign with Notre Dame. Effectively ruining Christmas for many Tennessee Taliban-Vols Fans whose lives depend on what a 17 year old does or does not do.
Smith continues a tradition that includes Patrick Turner (USC), Brandon Turner (FSU), Golden Tate (Irish) to announce for schools out of Tennessee (I know I forgot some others). The Brentwood Academy to AUburn pipeline must count in here someplace for talent leaving the state.
It has been rumored that Smith’s dad was less than enamored with the Vols. Dr. Smith, a UT Grad, prefers the Fatman’s cooking over the Tennessee Fatman.
Thank God Smith did not embarrass the raucous and sucidal Tennessee fan-base by announcing for the Irish on the UT focused television show “Hound Dogs” hosted by Mark “Fudge” Packer . Last years top in-state recruit Brandon Warren committed to FSU on Hound Dogs. The follwing Tennessee Message Boards meltdowns were thermo-orgasmic. New Years prediction? Chris Donald, the top in-state prospect, will commit to the Irish as well. The message boards will be serving Jim Jones Orange-flavored Kool-aid.
(Hound Dog host Fudge Packer and PaPa Bowden hamming it up)
Good gosh almighty, I feel for the Smiths. Trying to do the best for their son and still have to live in Knoxville with all of those idiots? Good luck
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Is this another one of the homosexual-oriented band camp threads?
Like the band camp thread where the fat man crapped in the tuba?
Y’know, when I read about Smith’s verbal I immediately thought of the sumo connection. Immediately. Way to actionize it.
Your creativity is unbelievable! Good analogy though. You alway keep me smiling!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bags
Looks like I got in a hurry writing that piece