Tips for the not so ‘With It’ recruitniks

2007 January 31
by Poster formerly known as Irishjihad


Kids, National Signing Day is less than a week away, and we here at LWS know that there are several of you out there that are lost in a sea of internet recruiting info. If you long to be a true insider, read this. But for the casual observer that wants to know how to use the recruiting services to your favor, here’s a few helpful tips:

  1. Stars mean absolutely nothing. (If your team just signed a 4 or 5 star player, see Tip #2) Rating prospective football players is purely subjective. Use terms like ’sleeper’ or ‘diamond in the rough’ for any player rated 2 stars or less. And always state how great an evaluator of talent your coach is. It never hurts to throw in stuff like this either: “Demeco Ryans was only a two star coming out of high school and look how good he was“.  For a 3 star player, use this dandy line: “I’d rather have a team full of three star players that want to put on the (insert team colors here) than a bunch of 5 star primadonnas.”
  2. Stars mean everything. Heck, these people at Scout and Rivals get paid to rate these players. Who cares that none of them ever played the game. As noted in the linked post, feel free to use terms like ‘stud‘ or ‘speciman‘ when speaking of a highly touted recruit. Look at the rosters of Texas and USC and tell me stars don’t matter, punk.
  3. In determining what service to use, just use the one that has your team rated the highest. Use the same factor when discussing a committed player with a rival.
  4. If a player that had previously committed to your school changes his mind and commits to another university, it can only be one of three reasons:(a) he couldn’t get accepted into your college of choice (Note: UT fans can not, on any occasion, use this excuse); (b) he was obviously bought and paid for by the team he chose; or (c) he was scared off by competition for a starting spot. Always follow these excuses with this statement:”Well, he doesn’t project as good to the college game as (insert recruit that plays same position here)”, or “He looked slow on his game tapes anyway“.
  5. If your team is listed as a favorite for recruit ‘X’, and he chooses another school, it is mandatory to rationalize his decision by stating that you knew where he was going all along.  (Ex. Yeah, McNeil chose the Barn over Alabama. Heck, everyone knew he was a heavy Auburn lean from the beginning.)

Hope this helps guide you through next Wednesday as your team attempts to win the only title that matters: The Recruiting National Championship

from → JoePa, SEC Football, college football recruiting

8 Responses leave one →
  1. 2007 January 31
    Anal Technician permalink

    What in the world have you been eating, Rush?

  2. 2007 January 31
    Anal Technician permalink

    This is like looking at an Indian’s poop.

  3. 2007 January 31
    Rush Propst permalink

    Good stuff, Seize the Moment Motherfucker

  4. 2007 January 31
    Marcus Thomas permalink

    May I borrow a bong?

  5. 2007 January 31
    Jarvis Moss permalink

    You still have my hand scales Marcus?

  6. 2007 February 1
    Cool Hand Mike permalink

    Marcus, Marcus, Marcus

    All you need is a Coke can, a safety pin, and a saying. What Would MacGyver Do?

    CHM aka Luke North KotMS

  7. 2007 February 1
    loserwithsocks permalink

    WWMD?

Trackbacks & Pingbacks

  1. I got ‘dem National Signing Day blues, mama. « Get The Picture

Leave a Reply

Note: You can use basic XHTML in your comments. Your email address will never be published.

Subscribe to this comment feed via RSS