(pic from Slamdizzle)

1)LSU- If Les Miles goes to Michigan, he will dominate the Big 10. The speed of the Big 10 ‘game’ will be so much slower to him after being in the SEC. Les Miles sent a clear message to 92,000 coon-asses on-hand last Saturday night at Death Valley, that he can turn “it” on at anytime he chooses. Right WingNut?

2) Florida- How much of an issue is Tebow’s shoulder? It is his non-jerking shoulder, so it is probably not a big issue at all. Gates, don’t worry about the rankings. Herban has everything under control. He knows what he’s doing. concerning Florida’s relatively low BCS rankings, it must be comforting when Herban said in last week’s interview, “the early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.”

3)UK- Unbelievable season. UK won the game and the cheaters from Gunsville took it away from UK by making them fumble the old pigskin twice and catching one of their very own passes!

4)Auburn- Love the Barn. I thought they were peaking. Lets face it, Barners are just arrogant, what with their “grajeated players, their “players that ain’t on crack”, their “players that don’t head butt”, their “players who don’t get free text books”, and so on. betcha that they win the rest of their games.

5)Georgia- Oh Mark Richt, I saw some nude photos of Helen Hunt and became aroused. Is that wrong? Later this week I will publish why UGA wins the Mullet Bowl.

6) South Carolina-Will the Old Ball Sack Coach administer the final the nail in Phil Fulmer’s coffin? People only talk about how bad the Cocks played Vandy. but very few discuss how well Vandy played. Those people have no idea what football is all about run their mouth.

7) Bama-Saban is bringing UAT back to the glory years of our father and grandfathers. Sure they may not be a player nationally any longer but by God they have a bunch of National Championships from years ago…just like the Vandy’s and Colgate’s and Army’s all of those teams use to be great centuries long gone. They all have something the Barn and the Viles don’t have …tradition.

8)Vols-After being dealt a humiliating loss at the hands of the State of Alabama’s Flagship University last Saturday, Coach Phillip Fulmer was able to hold his “poker stare” Saturday in the Ghetto of T-Town long enough to make Saban flinch, and cash-in yet one more moral victory of this highly successful gridiron campaign.  A defense is terrible that the Vols accomplished the impossible, they made Sarah Jessica John Parker Wilson look like a good QB.

Remember, finishing 7th or 8th in the SEC is nothing to sneeze at, it is the same as winning the Big 10 Championship!!

9) Miss State-Do not misunderestimate him. Sly Croom is a hard-nosed, old school coach and a defensive genius.  I stand by my prediction that a prestigious pre-New Years Bowl Game is in the offing!!

10)Arkansas-McFadden is back!!! Did you see how he lit up the potent Ole Miss defense? Nutt and Broyles has done a lot for Arkansas. and I, for one, really appreciate it. the entertainment they have provided us has been priceless.

11)Vandy- this team sucks in the red zone because the o-line can’t open a running lane against a bunch of girl scouts carrying a load of cookies. Just admit defeat now and cancel the season.

12)Ole Miss-when the alum and boosters get tired of this crap…….they will go down and dig up John Vaught. Then again, maybe Ole Miss should keep Orgeron. He is the best coach out there. I mean he is going to win another championship (I can not remember how many they have but I bet it is a lot) for Ole Miss so it does not matter what our record is.