He never beat Auburn

Update: I just received this updated photo.
The irony of this situation is pretty thick. As a Tennessee fan, I automatically take issue with Timbag winning the Heisman. But it is more than that. Not only has Timbag never beaten Auburn…he’s gay. Wait, that’s not what I wanted to say. Oh yeah, his shit team has 3 losses. Wow. That is funny. I always thought wins and losses were a key ingredient to the complicated algorithm used to select the winner…apparently, that doesn’t apply now. It was the main argument, however, when Peyton Manning was snubbed in 97 for Charles Woodson (Eric Berry’s stats this year are better than Woodson’s in 1997). “Peyton can’t beat Florida!”…oh the irony.
Enjoy your Heisman, Tim.
I hope Jerod Mayo breaks your face.
















Vote here

yeah but he stomped tennessee
yeah but he makes out with other guys, you ever hear of butt secks? He does it
you would prolly know cause he prolly gave it to you in your A$$
Ya know, when I saw that Tim Tebow won the Heisman, I just kinda shrugged and thought “Eh. They got the wrong guy. Oh well.” and moved on, knowing that the NFL separates the wheat from the chaff.
Looking at the last 18 or so entries on this site, somebody’s got a man-crush.
Wow! And Jai didn’t even do this one! Shock of the year! So there’s two of ya’s!
@3 he was in the receive mode…if you get my drift?
@6 what ever you like to fantasize about is your business
and they say Jai is fixated on Bama. I think he is celebrating Timmmay’s historic win!!!
Chomp on my wiener
@7 kitchen to hot? I thought brokeback was OK in Gainesville these days?
i think you’re angry cause you know that the sooners are going to stomp all over West Vagina Mountaineers
A UT fan resorting to the “he never beat Auburn” line? Wow. That’s sad.
oh my, a florida fan resorting to “the sooners are going to stomp all over West Vagina Mountaineers” line? Wow. That;s sad
chomp my wiener like joiner chomps ??
is that a line?
I had never heard it until I read it on this kick ass site.
And its true… he never beat Auburn.
Him beating Auburn has nothing to do with the Heisman, UT, etc. But it’s typical of UT fans to use that type of logic. I harbor no ill feelings towards Tennessee or their fans, so I have a hard time understanding why they hate us Gators so much.
Maybe they’re upset because they’re 6-12 versus UF since 1990? Or maybe it’s because UF is 6-2 in SECCG whereas they’re 2-3? Or maybe it’s because UF has 3 Heisman winners to their 0? Or maybe they’re still upset that their Golden Boy Peyton never beat UF (or won the Heisman)? Or maybe it’s because both UF and UGA have multiple SEC Championships since they last won one? I don’t know.
In a way, UT is like the one friend you have who never gets laid. So he’s always high-strung, not thinking clearly, and upset at his friends who always get laid. He (UT) has a lot of jealousy and angst built up.
I think that all of you are bunch of dopesmoking thugs that cheat at football.
Typical of UT fans? Really?
The same logic was used in 1997 when “Peyton couldn’t beat Florida”…
that’s kind of funny considering Peyton actually won the SEC that year and only had one loss before the Heisman presentation. Tebow…well, he led his team to a 9-3 record. Spec-fucking-tacular.
You are choking on the irony. Even as a WVU fan (Slaton and White were both robbed) I have to admit that Tebow winning the Heisman is hilarious.
So I’m waiting for a seat at a restaurant on Friday night, it was one of those classy joints where they put your picture on the wall if you eat their big burger. And the waitress comes by and hangs up a picture. The guy in the picture is wearing an orange & blue shirt, so my friend says, “Hey, look, he’s a gator.” None of us got up to take a close look at the picture.
So another 5 minutes or so goes by, and the guy turns the corner and my wife says, “That guy in the picture, it’s Tim Tebow!” So I turn to see, and sure enough, here comes Tim Tebow right at me. At first I’m playing it cool, just watching from afar. But then I realize, how often do I get this chance, so I got up out of my chair and went and shook his hand and said, “It’s a pleasure to meet you. Great job!” and I gave him a pat on the back. I have not washed my hands, but I did touch myself in my Special/Sensitive Spot with the hand that touched Tebow!!
I then let him have sex with my wife and he made me pay for his burger.
@15
I guess all that football played before 1990 is irrelevant to the gator nation.
Navin “LL” Johnson: Uh, anything in this general area right in here. Anything below the stereo and on this side of the bicentennial glasses. Anything between the ashtrays and the thimble. Anything in this three inches right in here in this area. That includes the Chiclets, but not the erasers.
Tebow has a MNC ring, SEC ring, a Heisman, Maxwell, and O’Brian and he is only a sophomore. Hmmmm…I don’t think he’s losing any sleep over the Auburn thing.
We might wear jean shorts but you still live in Alabama. Say ‘hi’ to your cousin for me.
My mistake, you still live in Tennessee.
Still inbred but, with more mountains.
The only time I was ever in Gainesville, there were rainbows hanging from signposts and big banners promoting Gay Pride week, there were even people in shirts that said Gay Gator on them. So now if any Florida fan ever wants to make fun of another campus or school i just laugh and remember that drive through town. UT fans may have sex with their cousins, but atleast they are female cousins.
Oh and it’s a good thing Tebow won the Heisman this year, b/c he’s never going to finish a season at Florida healthy. Like Christopher Reeve, this Superman too will end up in a wheelchair.
Tebow and Joiner are members
http://grove.ufl.edu/~ggsa/
Chomp Chomp!!!
@17:
There is no irony because Peyton never won the Heisman. Pay attention.
@19:
Quit putting words in my mouth. I have never once said that UF football didn’t exist prior to ‘90. All Gators know that the arrival of Spurrier made the program what it is today.
But hey, if by continuously pointing that out it helps you deal with the fact that UF has accomplished much more than UT since 1990, then so be it.
@23:
It takes a real pussy like yourself to root for a player to get injured.
@26
You never said it (not that I ever said you did), but you constantly infer to and use 1990 as a measuring stick as to how much better UF is over everyone. Point being that there was alot of football played before 1990 which most gator fans conveniently ignore.
@28
That’s because football didn’t exist in Gainesville until 1990.
I don’t know why all you UT fans got your panties in a bunch. It’s not like the florida fans got to cast a ballot for the heisman.
@28 & 29
Before 1990 UF didn’t mean shit to UT. They had very little history with the exception of winning quite a few games in the 60s and some good years in the 80s (but they were on probation then). Hell, UF and UT didn’t even play every year. Regardless, it doesn’t change the fact that UF has always had a loyal fan following.
With the arrival of Spurrier in 1990 and the SEC going to 2 divisions very soon thereafter, UF and UT started playing every year and were by far the 2 best teams in the East year in and year out. Because of Spurrier’s dominance of UT and UF racking up championship after championship, UT fans grew to HATE UF. That is a FACT.
Beat your chest all you want — “How dare this team from Florida with no tradition start winning in the SEC! We won the National Championship in 1951 despite losing our bowl game! We won the NC when there were 37 College Football Polls each season, not like this BCS crap!” Hold on to the past. That’s fine with me.
I find it hilarious that UT fans constantly make fun of Alabama for always referencing their great tradition, yet UT does the same shit with UF. Hmmmm…….
Bottom Line: UF has accomplished more than UT over the past decade or so. And in this day in age where the majority thinks in the context of “what have you done for me lately”, that seems to stick with most people a little bit more than UT’s rich history. It bothers you that UF’s emergence from decades of mediocrity tends to overshadow UT and be a constant thorn in their side.
It bothers YOU that Steve Speed Slaton and Patrick Touchdown White are too talented… the Heisman can’t be given to two players so…the outstanding talent on my eers team is so much that you cant give just one award
oklahoma… we’re coming
Slaton and White = Irrelevant
Just ask Pitt.
That is a laugh!
WVU will be ranked higher than the Geightors to start the 2008 season. 2008 will be a blast for eer fans. We are going to win it all.
Speed Slaton. Touchdown White.
Timbo Teaman will not make it through 2008 uninjured.
You like to laugh? It’s laughable how you all were 28 point favorites and 60 minutes away from playing for the NC but you couldn’t close the deal….. at home…. against a 4-7 Pitt team from the lowly Big East.
And look at you. You’ve already started up the same mantra you’ve been saying for the last 2 years now – “Wait til next year.” LMAO
Maybe you haven’t noticed, but Tebow played through his injuries. Unlike a pussy QB in Morgantown.
What does it matter? We are in a BCS bowl…you get to play a team that lost to app. state…and they will probably beat you. You know who else is in a BCS bowl? UGA, who HUMILIATED you on national TV. That fat 77 guy is still dancing in your face. Your slave handler coach insured Tebow would win the heisman by running him like a fullback over and over and over again. Tebow is too dumb (890 SAT) to know any better. For his sake I hope he goes pro after next year because I don’t think he will survive. Unlike Speed Slaton and Touchdown White. Which brings me to another point, your coach, Suburban Meyer, is taking credit for RR’s patented spread option offense. Typical gators trying to steal the Eer Champion’s thunder. Speed Slaton.
Cows and Fags (#37):
“Typical gators trying to steal the Eer Champion’s thunder”…
Champions of what???
Choking on the big dick that was the Eers’ BCS CG berth…
All they had to do was beat 4 TD underdog Pitt…
IN MORGANTOWN…
And their long elusive MNC was theirs for the taking…
That shouldn’t have been too tough…
BUt apparently for the Eers it is…
“What does it matter?” Hey, if looking at it like that helps you deal with the fact that you all pulled one of the biggest choke jobs EVER, so be it.
“Eer Champion”? What the fuck have you all ever won?! NOTHING! No National Championships, No Heisman Winners, Nothing. Except a Sugar Bowl victory over UGA 2 years ago. That’s it. That’s the only thing you have ever won.
The only time WVU ever came close to a NC they got waxed by Notre Dame in 1988. Then, WVU bitched about being undefeated and left out of the NC picture in 1994 only to have a 10-2 Florida team run a clinic on them in the Sugar Bowl 41-7.
Face it. You were never anything better than a 4th place team in the Big East before Miami, VATech and BC skipped town. Now, you reap the benefits of playing in a weak conference filled with 40,000 seat stadiums and Conference USA rejects. ‘Eers having been spouting off for 2 years now that they’re going to be playing in the BCS title game only to choke against the weakest of the weak in their own conference.
Sorry I wrote for so long. You might want to go check on that meth you have cookin’ out in the shed.
LL
Those Eer fans are right behind bammeroids for delusion
Check this link:
http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2007/sioncampus/12/11/campus.clicks1211/index.html
USF whipped Auburn. they beat you guys
their kickar even did the fuckin chomp
owned
@41 hell yes
Hmmm…
Which is worse…
Being beaten by Auburn with no MNC expectations for the season…
OR
Being splittailed by a 4 TD underdog in your backyard with a MNC berth dangling in your face…
/WVU in the BCS
//UF in the BrokeBack Bowl
///Tebow kisses guys
Lemme guess, EEr fans…
Wait til next year?
Peyton Manning (0-4) agains the mighty Gators
too bad so sad Dirty Vols
Mqybe we get UF next year and Timmy can experience a 3-3-5 beatdown too.
Speaking of beatdowns, what is the rumor of Percy whipping Fayson’s ass? Then Herban covering it up with the ‘migraine’ story? Not that Harvin has ever had an anger management problem in the past or anything
High 5 Percy!!
@46, this is WVU and UF smack. Go fix me a sandwich
Tim Thebag 0-2 Versus Auburn
Speed Slaton and Touchdown White would make The Bag look like a, um, a bag.
angry eer – written by tennessee fan. dork
go play with your boyfriend
What about Noel??? he seems ok with his speed and shape shifting
@50 Iron my shirt
What about Devine?
Has he pulled even with Jamal in the “First to field my own football team with kids from different moms” yet”?
Why don’t you go wax your stache, honey?
Thank goodness for the weak schedule and the BCS contract or WVU would be…well, I’m just not sure.
Hey Eeyore, have you finished that break down of how Kendra=Tebow?
@ 40
Jai based on what i have seen lately, i have to disagree and place WVU fans as the most delusional fan base in the country. As much as i hate to admit, bama has actually won a few championships. WVU fans seem to think they have won championships or that they are ineveitable. They still consider that sugar bowl win over UGA as the greatest win of all time (nevemind that they almost blew a 28 point lead).
Bottom line, WVU has never accomplished anything (other than a couple of Big LEast titles), but they think they are the best fucking team of all time. How can they not be the most delusional fans in the country?
@55
/You have mixed up the BE with the Big 10.
//Kendra was faster than Tebow
///Kendra was more bullish that Tebow
///Thank whatever pagan god that you gators worship that you will not feel the wrath that is coming down on the Sooners
Once more Gators:
Speaking of beatdowns, what is the rumor of Percy whipping Fayson’s ass? Then Herban covering it up with the ‘migraine’ story? Not that Harvin has ever had an anger management problem in the past or anything
High 5 Percy!!
All this jealousy and vitriol over Tebow’s heisman reminds me of Ayn Rand…
“Jealousy is the tribute mediocrity pays to genius”
Suck it, MediocritEers…
jealousy haha
the award is obviously worthless as the author of this post pointed out. like they did with peyton in 97…they just give it to whoever the fuck they want to. i dont see how you can bash tenesee fans, they won their fucking division
All these WVU post may have different names on them, but it is quite obvious that they are the same person
look kids!
its sherlock fucking holmes
I am but one, the others? I can not vouch for them. I welcome my Gold Rush Brothers
still waiting on a Harvin response…..
They’re probably just some of your cousins that you have been bangin’ this afternoon
@65 Watch it, or I will withdraw my support of LSU vs the Failboats
So, Mikeer…
If it’s worthless then why are you here pissing and moaning about it?
Seems you and the grill visor could just dismiss it and walk away…
Since it’s so worthless…
Right?
Right?
@66 Please do
@68….Amazing…..
Angry, I don’t think anybody that posts here gives two ass squirts what you think…
Not even one squirt
Can we get another “Wait till next year” from the Big LEast champs?
@72? What BCS bowl is your team playing in??? Auburn, correct?
I cant believe how dumb Tennessee fans really are. I try to give the benefit of the doubt to most, but come on. Tebow had 51 TD’s. Your boys got beat by 39. Wait it looks better put this way: 59-20. Thats disgraceful. You also disgraced the SEC by getting manhandled by Cal. Seriously, Cal? He has started 1 game against Auburn so that argument is ridiculous as well. You’re an idiot is basically what I’m trying to say.
@ angryQueer
Auburn playing in a BCS bowl is not the issue. They had a down year. The issue is all the smack you quEERS talk about your second rate, big game choking, about to be irrelevent football team.
Doubtful, Joker…
Angry realizes the Eer’s ship has sailed…
Slaton goes pro…
Rich Rod goes to a real school…
Pat White joins Chris Leak in the AAFL…
And Noel Devine transfers to USF in order to be closer to his 25 kids and not get smash mouthed by the Bull defense again…
No fear though…
WVD will be talked about again in 8 – 12 years…
It’s their cycle…
@40
Jai:
Congrats on making it to SI.com!
Also, you are correct about the WVU Delusion.
hippy:
You’re right. Rod would bolt out of there in a heartbeat if the right job came open. He said at the beginning of last season that he’d never leave Morgantown yet he couldn’t talk to the Bama people fast enough.
Thanks LL. It is the second time. I hve no idea how or who submitted us. Did you reead the Tebow interview, where they ask about the photo?
Rod will never leave. He is WV’s favorite mexican son
Borges
Jai:
Yeah, I read it the other day. Good shit. I wore jorts in elementary school. Who didn’t? I had no eye for fashion then.
Did you see Colt Brennan wearing jorts on ESPN? What with those be called? Aloha Jorts? Mella-ka-leek-e-maka Jorts?
@ AngryQueer
was that another attempt at a 3rd grade smack against Auburn?
@80
You just wait, ‘Eer. Rod is just waiting for the right time to go all Ole Miss Tuberville on you guys.
Well, maybe Tommy Tubberville should win the Heisman…
============
- lawvol: http://Gate21.net – Life, the Universe, & College Football
well I sure as hell have never worn jorts, way to Brokebackish
Wingnut and the pinebox….Why did Borges leave?
@ lawvol
I went to Life University
Okay, I tried to resist, but I couldn’t resist the urge. Let me attempt to put it in the proper perspective for you. Before I began, let me first say that I have tremendous respect for the SEC, its teams, and it’s history of excellence.
As for Auburn, while Tebow has yet to beat Auburn, let’s look a little deeper and examine why Auburn is not the measuring stick of greatness in the West. In order to do this we have to look at what Auburn accomplished before & after the conf split into divisions in ’92. Pre-divisionsal split, Auburn went 86-31 in the 80’s with 2 outright SEC titles in ‘83(11-1) & ‘87(9-1-2) matching that of LSU & Alabama and shared conference titles in ’88 & ’89. Although there was competitive football being played in the West, there is no clear cut dominant champion that can make the claim as the most dominant team of that division during that time period. On the flip side, during the 80’s, Florida went 76-38 with 0 conf titles. Georgia however won 2 outright conference titles in ’80 & ’82, with a shared conf title in ’81. Tennessee had one title in ’85, and a shared title in ’89. Again, no outright sign of dominance by either team in the East either, but I’ll give a slight edge to Georgia since they did win a national title in ’80 and played for another in ’81 & ’82.
Now, let’s look at how the trend switches after the conf split into divisions in ’92. Auburn, went 72-40-3, and won the Western division in ‘97(10-3). Florida went 102-22, with 5 conf titles, and 1 national title. Florida in this particular decade was the gold standard by which excellence was measured by.
As for this decade, LSU has 2 conf titles, Florida has 2, Georgia has 2, Auburn has 1. I’ll give slight advantages to LSU & Florida because we have the only national titles from the conference. What I’m saying is this, while every game is indeed important in the SEC, Auburn was never really “the team to beat.” I know that Auburn pulled off big wins both this year and last year, but what did Auburn go on to do to solidify great victories…nothing. Victories over Florida & LSU do more to validate a successful season for your programs than they do for ours, just ask Georgia. There’s a lot more I’m ready to say, but I’ll just wait for the replies to come rolling in.
P-funk
nice, but I wonder if the comments on this post are dead
P-Funk:
Good work. Nice to see someone referencing fact rather than opinion.
Not disagreeing with much of your post, but LSU has 3 conf titles this decade, 01, 03, and this year. Auburn did have that one undefeated season, where they got the shaft from the national title, but overall I agree with you.
Is this really WestbyGod fans talking smack? Really? The team that got whiteashed by who? Oh yeah, Pitt. Effing rednecks.
I beg to differ with you on your comment about Berry’s stats being better than Woodson’s in 97.
Woodson:
1 rushing TD
2 receiving TD’s
8 INT’s with 1 TD
Punt Return 1 TD
Berry:
No offensive TD’s
5 INT’s with 1 TD
It’s not even close!!!!!
Check it for yourself: Woodsons stats: http://bentley.umich.edu/athdept/football/fballam/aawoodsn.htm
Berry’s stats: http://livestats.epiccycle.com/tennessee/boxscores/07-08/football/TEAMCUME.HTM#TEAM.IND
My bad, he didnt have the TD on the INT’s. Mistyped it. But still not close.
” It was the main argument, however, when Peyton Manning was snubbed in 97 for Charles Woodson (Eric Berry’s stats this year are better than Woodson’s in 1997). ”
NOPE!
If Peyton was so great why wasn’t he named to the list of College Football’s 25 Greatest Players of All Time by ESPN. I am pretty sure Woodson is on there at #11.
I’m a Gator, and I have always felt that Manning should have won the Heisman in ‘97. UT was lucky to get him – imagine if he had been the starter at UF – not only would he have won the Heisman, possibly twice, but UF might have won another National Championship in 1997. The lack of a good QB at UF in ‘97 cost us several games that year, the loss at LSU knocked us from #1. I truly believe that there was a bias against Manning by the Heisman voters who did not want to see another SEC QB win the award two years in a row. Woodson couldn’t carry Manning’s jock on his best day.