Mercy Percy!! These Florida Girls are scared

2008 March 11
by Jai Eugene

Gainseville emergency room are filling up with 300 lb women in “He15man ” shirts, women who have “fallen down the trailer stairs”. Many have broken noses, missing teeth, black eyes, broken ribs, and bruised kidneys. These “accidents” always happen when Florida loses or things don’t go the “right” way.

Here is a hero. A hero that has decided not to have she is not going to have an “accident”. This cheerleader-girl isn’t 300 pounds (yet) but she knows that if Florida is on the bubble and might not make the Big Dance; they may wind up in the NIT; this means in her trailer park all-star world that the “accidents” are the on the way [GatorSports]. She tried to use her computer savvy skills to save her wounded comrades. What will happen to her and women like her? Oprah? Where are you???

This courageous cheerleader speaks for all of the women in her off-campus trailer park as she silently pleading with the NCAA Selection Commitee to please let the Gators in the Tourney. She and her fellow trailer park women have to be tired of “falling down the trailer park steps” . until this past weekend, they’ve incorrectly believed that they were safe then all of a sudden, Kentucky swoops in and beats the Gators. She and all her friends end up with cracked teeth broken noses, black eyes, broken ribs, and various internal injuries(usually kidneys).

Please NCAA, let Florida in the final 64. Think of the women.

16 Responses leave one →
  1. 2008 March 11
    AAus permalink

    Emergency rooms shouold begin getting some Red Cross support. Gators are going to go NIT

  2. 2008 March 11
    Ears Whitworth permalink

    Do think that the cheerleader can carry 300 pounds of fat?

  3. 2008 March 11

    Crisis Center Hotline 800-GAY-tors.

  4. 2008 March 11

    I’m proud of our young Gators this year. No one expected this team to win 20 games or go an even 8-8 in the SEC. They probably won’t (and shouldn’t) make the Tourney, but that’s fine. Gotta look at the positive: the immediate future looks bright for the next 2-3 years or so (especially with 2 highly touted 6′10″ recruits coming in next year) and the streak of 10 straight 20-win seasons is still intact.

  5. 2008 March 11
    Ears Whitworth permalink

    Iron my Jorts, LL

  6. 2008 March 11

    Ears:
    I’d rather wear jorts every day for the rest of my life than be from the state of Alabama.

  7. 2008 March 11
    SWFnole permalink

    Shut up Gate

  8. 2008 March 12
    nica gator permalink

    2 straight NCs …. suck it noles

  9. 2008 March 12
    gatorhippy permalink

    And four straight crotch bootings of FSU football…

    Suck it some more Noles…

  10. 2008 March 12
    Dick York permalink

    @10

    My Jorts….Iron them

  11. 2008 March 12
    Dick York permalink

    Now

  12. 2008 March 12
    gatorhippy permalink

    @11

    You wear jorts?!?!?

    Wow…

  13. 2008 March 12
    Dick York permalink

    Who doesn’t?

  14. 2008 March 12
    gatorhippy permalink

    Well…

    Myself for one…

    But you where whatever you’d like, bro…

    Don’t bother me…

  15. 2008 March 12
    zigzag permalink

    Danny Noriega wears jorts.

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