The new breed of SEC Fan

2008 May 30
by Jai Eugene

As SEC football expands and consumes America, there is a new wolf growling at the door.

A new generation of football fan is taking over. It is a Slack-jawed, bone smuggling, tea bagging, urine tossing, donkey punching, blumpkin giving, open-mouth breathing, nihilistic, voyeuristic, and sometimes brash new breed of SEC Football Fan. These card carrying NAMbLA, Trailer Park Allstars, crackers, punks, thugs, and rappers are growing their roots into old school SEC Country, and it’s a hostile takeover. Wearing a Gator Game Jersey while you buy a nickel bag of weed has become the new ‘Punk’.

It’s gone from kiss my ass, to: “Motherfucker kiss my ass, while I draw a crowd and charge admission and then make a youtube of the performance”.

Look what these vandals did to Tim Tebow’s former high school [link]:

This new breed of fans approaching life and SEC football like it’s a video game. Face it, anybody can wear a black jersey (especially when it is not your school colors) , get some tats, dance the end zone, get a mohawk or dye their hair orange and blue or pretend they are a Gator, but this takes balls. It’s the ultimate middle finger.

What would Leonard Postosties think?

12 Responses leave one →
  1. 2008 May 30
    Dickey permalink

    Can you call it a breed? More like an infestation.

  2. 2008 May 30
    Jim Bob Cooter permalink

    One of the pictures from the link has “Bear Invasion” written in grafitti. Could their be a Bammer connection in all of this?
    Let’s not forget that their are a shitload of UGA fans in Jax.

  3. 2008 May 30
    zigzag permalink

    Those 300 pound profanity spewing, bimbos from Bama fit in here somewhere.

  4. 2008 May 30
    Phat Phil permalink

    I’m guessing it’s a reference to the Bartram Trail Bears, a rival high school.

  5. 2008 May 30

    Jim Bob-
    You’re right, there are a ton of UGA fans in Jax (who used to be Nole fans in the 90s, AND who were UGA fans before that back in the 80s.)

    Phat Phil-
    You are correct, too.

  6. 2008 May 30
    Jim permalink

    In all honesty, I would bet dollars to donuts that the intellectually stunning piece of art was not that of an SEC fan but the handy work of the mongoloid known as the “nole”. They are really a subhuman species that needs to be studied and then summarily eliminated.

  7. 2008 May 31

    Well there aint an Asian boy’s dick that Timmy can’t hack
    Gator fans in jort shorts all up in his sack
    They got the business on the top, party in the back
    Thank God I’m a Bama fan.

  8. 2008 May 31
    Jim Bob Cooter permalink

    Thank God you’re a Bama fan.

  9. 2008 June 1
    Anonymous permalink

    It’s ok, the rest of the country already thinks this is the average SEC fan. Reality had to catch up with perception sooner or later.

  10. 2008 June 1
    zigzag permalink

    10-I don’t know about the “rest of the country” but those Fails from Ohio got the full treatment from the Gates and Corndog U.

  11. 2008 June 1

    More on the Failboats tomorrow.

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