The Big Orange Roundtable Numba 5, bitch

2008 August 7
by Jai Eugene

1. One former VOL made the brave choice to testify against some Bammers and has to enter witness protection with a whole new identity, but that also gives him 4 more years of eligibility. Which VOL would you pick and why?

Numba 54, Bradley County’s own native son: Dale Jones, He broke the Bammeroids spine with the acrobatic interception in the backfield 1985 at the shithole also known as Legion Field.  That was the year that Tennessee rode the momentum from the win to an SEC title and Sugar Bowl victory over da U.

But I know that the Red Elephant Club is strong, strong like Clubber Lang strong.  Dear sweet Jeebus. I believe that Bammeroids would lie when it is easier to tell the truth.

The sad thing is – no one will care and Dale’s efforts would go to waste.

This will be one more egregious sin against the people, the constitution, the SEC and the Republic. And nothing will happen. Except more Bammeroid cheating……

I want another Dale Jones playing for my beloved Vols.  He was the balls of a huge fucking cat.

Dale Jones, go! OMG! So awesome! He is pure fucking magic! It as if God himself created this team. I can not believe how awesome they are. MY God, look at that. This is perfection. Perfection! OMG!

Maybe Daniel Moore could do a tribute on the oskie?

2. Alabama has been given the death penalty and is forced to leave the SEC, at the same time South Carolina decides it can win a lot more in the Sunbelt conference and bolts the SEC. Two teams have to take their place who would you like to see take their place?

It is so satisfying to see a a plan come together.  The plan that I am talking about is the letter writing campaign that I have advocated to expel this infected program into the void known as the  Mountain West Conference.  I would think that Clemson would be a logical fit since their fans are not used to “moral” victories like Carolina fans.  They expect to win every week unlike SCAR who always finds a way to lose.  Georgia Tech would be awesome too.  Aren;t they like the original owners of UGA?

It is to damn bad this is a wet dream that will never come true.  With our luck Bama will win the SEC and the devil will be given credit for the championship and the die will be cast.

Hurry people, It is not too late to save the SEC.


3. What will be the toughest road game to win and why?
Da Barn.  Fulmer will plan to fall behind the new-fangled fast break spread option offense that the WingNut has installed for the turd-knockers in east alabama .  Sure Fulmer’s “scorched earth” attack plan may seem risky to some. However, it will be  clear during this contest, that Battle Captain is certainly in charge of this football team. Vols fans can rest easy, knowing that they have seasoned coach that can will his team to a victory over a highly touted SEC West ball club. Wait till Clawson opens up the playbook against the corn cobs. It’s going to be crying time for the Barners.

4. Could have the great Coach Fulmer handled himself better at the SEC media event when he was asked about the subpoena instead of asking what subpoena?
Hindsight is always 20-20 bitches.  Honestly how can any Vol fan question the decision-making processes of the Dean of SEC Coaches? Madness bitches, MADNESS. Being the best coach in the SEC is a lonely lonely task. One can only imagine the trials and tribulations that Fulmer must face on a daily basis.  The subpoena?  I am sure he thought it was Christmas in July Tamale and only needed to add some guacamole to it.
9 Responses leave one →
  1. 2008 August 7
    Your daddy, BAMA permalink

    Dale who? straight outta the trailer possibly?….you fail to mention the hit that Cornelius Bennett put on Johnson(qb) to knock his ass out of the game….

    The barn game wont be your toughtest roadie, trust me….the new revolutionary O as Ears calls it will self implode!

    So phatimus IS now admiting to receiving the suboena? super

  2. 2008 August 7

    You didn’t have balls to speak of Dale Jones. Who paid for Bennett?

  3. 2008 August 7

    I lol’d when i typed this:

    I believe that Bammeroids would lie when it is easier to tell the truth.

  4. 2008 August 7
    scorched colon permalink

    Bama Cheats

  5. 2008 August 8

    Ummm…… Florida won the SEC in 1985. But due to Bear Disciple Charley Pell infiltrating our program with his own version of “Bama Cheats”, we were on probation thus allowing Tennessee to get the Sugar Bowl invite.

Trackbacks & Pingbacks

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  4. Random Musings for Thursday « Your Mother Slept With Wilt Chamberlain

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