Close Encounter with the Cromptonites
..shudder…as we approach Tennessee glory. I bet that Tubby and his bunch of illiterate Barners are scared.
I think that Cromptonites, or the Tennessee Fans that shave and wash Jon Crompton’s balls, are the most obvious example of lunacy and delusion in Knoxville. I remember a couple of years ago I was with a bunch of friends and we decided, as a lark, to go into the ‘church’ in Knoxville, and take their free ‘personality’ test. That was one of the most bizzaro and unsettling experiences in my life.
They told me that I was intelligent but felt unfulfilled with life, and that I was looking for more. That I often felt sad and sometimes lonely. (Of course, afterward, when we compared notes, everyone who took the test had similar results). But it wasn’t so much what they said, but how they said it. They really get under your skin.
It’s creepy, but it’s a hoot Just go with friends. After you punk a ‘Nite, go to Cool Beans next door and have a Scotty Hopson Drink. It’s delicious and tasty.
Thank goodness for the internet, where Cromptonology is quickly becoming a joke.
Vote here
