Received this via email from Thomas at YMSWWC:
Bammeroid Boosters and Logan Young talent scouts [Saban to contact]. Please close your eyes, touch yourself in that special place as you imagine that I am a Memphis High School recruit, that I run a 4.4 40, bench 225 30 reps, 6′ 4″, possess a rocket arm and seek to inflict physical contact on anything and the bonus is that my high school coach is selling me. I think it is funny every time that Alabama Football and Memphis are mentioned in the same sentence. Most people would learn a life lesson, guess Bammeroids are different. Vols, Bitch.
Now send me 35 dollars so that I can attend the Crimson Caravan!! Like any good bammeroid, I am for sale. I want to meet Lil Bear, have my photo taken, and for your pleasure, I will wear the Bammeroid Crown of Thorns….a Houndstooth Ball Cap.
Attire?
Business Casual
Dear Jai Eugene:
I’m pleased to announce that this spring the Athletic Department will join the University Administration and National Alumni Association in launching the Crimson Caravan, featuring talks by University and Athletic Department officials, including head football coach Nick Saban. The Caravan will be stopping at the following areas on the following dates:
Crimson Caravan Schedule:
Stop 1 — Huntsville, AL on April 23rd and held at the Von Braun Center
Stop 2 — Memphis, TN on April 28th and held at the Peabody Hotel
Stop 3 — Birmingham, AL on April 30th and held at the Cahaba Grand
Stop 4 — Mobile, AL on May 5th and held at the Battle House
Stop 5 — Jackson, MS on May 7th and held at the Marriott Jackson
Stop 6 — Panama City, FL on May 12th and held at the Marriott Bay Point
Stop 7 — Montgomery, AL on May 14th and held at the Renaissance Hotel & Spa
Stop 8 — Atlanta, GA on May 19th and held at the Gwinnett Center
I’ll booby-trap the entrance to the Peabody, most likely using one of the famous ducks to secretly transport a concealed explosive device. Once Saban comes within range, I’ll detonate said device via remote control.
I’ll never be caught either. Why? Because I’ll be wearing that same Bammeroid costume you see above. I’ll fit right in with the rest of the Crimson-wearing, PBR-drinking, Red Man chewing ‘Roid crowd.
The brilliance is simplistic, yet elegant.
No need to resort to bombs and violence. This could all be handled with a few well timed (and well documented) visits by a few strippers. The Capstone just loves when their coaches are seen with one.
A strategically placed double wide with above ground pool, equipped with large quanties of Falstaff beer, BBQ nachos, Grizzly, big curling irons for the ladies, and ample outdoor facilities where fat women can squat to pee, would be the venue to attract the garden variety Bammeroid, thereby keeping them confined, so as not to pollute the general population.
[...] Crimson Caravan Coming to Memphis (Losers With Socks) [...]
@3 Nothing says status like an above ground pool…
@3 Jalepeno Chili Cheeseburgers and house divided tagas
Funny stuff. But #1 above, let me remind you of this: no one in the SEC will be attempting to assasinate Lame Queefin. In fact, every other program in the conference will pitch in to make sure that he is safe, well, happy, and the coach at UT for a long, long, long time . . . .
moondog, that could be your greatest comment ever.
PDBIED (Peabody Duck Borne Improvised Explosive Device)
@8 Thank you. I’ll be performing at the Peabody, ironically enough, when the ‘Roid Caravan comes to town.
7-Meyer and $aban are on pins and needles that Junior will only screw things up in Knoxville for three or four years. Blowouts by Bama and the Gaytors may be a thing of the past for that very reason. I can see those two teasing the Vol fan base with 24-14s and 31-21s just to keep that incompetent juvenile at the helm.
9-Is that in Top Hat and Tails?
[...] Crimson Caravan (Sports) [...]
You know, you vol’s are crazy …. You make comments about a coach that will continue to post many W’s in the future and, this crimson caravan is for charity …. all you walefare receiving vols should understand that concept … and bombs, illegal to threaten such…hmm….